The following is the text to episodes 5-8 of a series of videos I produced to expand upon the meaning of First Nephi 1:1 and make some difference for good in the world.
5. Spiritual Concrete
Two words of remarkable power, why they were chosen, and their everyday worth to you.
View the Video (6:05)
As we indicated last time, the Book of Mormon is a book of scripture like the Bible, written for our day. It is worth more than gold, filled with messages of personal power, meant for you. What is the source of its power? Could anything with such a fantastic backstory possibly be true? In this episode we begin walking through the book, mining its everyday worth to you.
How many times have you begun reading a book only to grow bored with it after a few pages and set it down? All serious authors know that the most important part of any book, besides the cover, is the first few words. In that brief span the author must engage the reader, set the volume’s tone, and convince him or her that this book is worth reading.
Nephi follows this principle with the first two words in his book, the phrase “I, Nephi”. Carefully chosen by a seasoned orator, author, poet, prophet and statesman over the 10 years he spent refining his message, their inclusion is intentional. They identify the speaker and prepare the reader to understand the context of his story.
He believed in their power so completely that he repeated the phase 86 times in his two books, underscoring repeatedly its authorship and importance. Several later contributors to the book followed his example.
“I, Nephi” is also partly autobiographical, a compact illustration of Nephi’s no-nonsense approach to life. He chose the words to dismiss all suggestion of subterfuge and guile, bulling then into the very front of his record. By so doing he declared, “I am who I am and take full responsibility for my words.”
As we reflect over Nephi’s writings, the words form a snapshot of him as an ironhanded middle-aged warrior king laying out the pedigree of a work God commanded him to produce. It is a colophon, as it were; a high-level summary of his most important product. He may not have understood every detail of its long-term value but he knew God had a plan for it.
Interestingly, the opening two words point to the phrase he uses to end his books: “I must obey”. They form bookends, tying the entire narrative into a cohesive bundle that spotlights his ultimate motivation. Whatever his fears, whatever his doubts, whatever the opposition or how long it took, the Lord had commanded him to create this work and he would do it. “I am Nephi,” he declared, “and I must obey.”
Even more, the first two words provide evidence that the book is a historical record, an actual product of his time. After the Book of Mormon was published in 1829, researchers began discovering Middle Eastern manuscripts written around Nephi’s time – 600 years before Christ – that contained similar literary structures. While today’s leaders sign their documents at the end, ancient leaders identified themselves up front, authenticating the weight, authority and consequences of their pronouncements. Nephi does the same, using his first two words as mallets to hammer into the reader’s mind his authority. Their presence is a subtle statement supporting Joseph Smith’s claim that the translation he created from ancient writings is the product he declared it to be.
Personally, I think these words are also the official stamp of a highly sensitive, plain-speaking prophet taking responsibility for his content. They form a warning, a sort-of literary “shaking the dust from his robes” ritual, as we will discuss later. It is a prophetic reminder that his words are not only fundamentally helpful in our everyday life, they will also stand as a witness for or against us in our everyday lives, and in the Day of Judgment. “I am Nephi,” he declares with words cemented in spiritual concrete. “My words matter.”
Once you begin to uncover their meaning, these two simple words become breathtaking and immensely powerful. They are the first hint that these works that he and the other Book of Mormon prophets labored over for a thousand years — and risked their lives for — have power, and that they have value for you today.
So, what is that value? Can they actually help you? In the next segment we will continue to research this promise, discussing the value of life, specifically your life, and its hope and unguessable potential. And we will see more viscerally how this book’s message applies to you today.
6. The Great Leveler
The core message of an ancient work and how it applies to our potential, our life and all lives today.
View the video (8:24)
Here we will build on the foundation we have laid, setting the scene, introducing the characters, and hinting at the Book of Mormon’s value. In this session we will begin to specify the book’s core messages, meant for you.
Nephi’s birth was unremarkable, just another one of many billions of children. Even more, he was an obscure infant thrust into obscure times in an obscure nation.
But this unknown child built a boat, crossed an ocean, founded a sprawling civilization, viewed our future, and wrote works that reach into our hearts today. Yes, he was another insignificant-seeming child born just like you with infinite potential and destinies no one could imagine.
Given what this unknown child accomplished, and standing him up alongside the same unknown potential of billions of children like him, his birth, just like the birth of every human being, is significant. Not just significant, but extraordinary. Who knows what that infant you hold in your arms can do? Who knows what you, together, can do?
In this way, birth is a great leveler: Whether you are born healthy or sick, rich or poor, with 22 siblings or none, each of us was born with some unknowable, infinite potential. Regardless of circumstance, each of us received a chance at life, a chance to start making a difference. We were born to make a magnificent destiny, in line to make the most of the plan laid by us and our father in heaven.
As we ponder the potential of each child born, we logically ask ourselves about the billions of our brothers and sisters who never got that chance. What about them?
For those children who died at or near birth, God grants us comforting assurances that His mercy and grace allows for the salvation of these children in the next life.
However, for those billions of children whose lives were taken by society, there are consequences.
In horrifying ways, the fundamental concept of granting life is under fire as it has never been before. Today, many in our society debate if we should have children at all. Some nations place quotas on the number of children you can have. Leaders and media outlets cry against having children at all, saying we must conserve resources to save the planet. As ill-informed and shortsighted as this is, the saddest part is that one of the major motivators for this push is the desire to make available more leisure time to the generation with the most leisure time in history. Many say that refusing to bring children into the world has no negative consequence, or if any consequence comes, it can be avoided. Some wield birth control as a weapon to eliminate entire classes of people. And in some places, humans are now legally allowed to kill their children during and even after birth.
At the dawn of human history, God affirmed the sanctity of life and commanded his children to multiply and replenish the earth, which commandment remains in force. Given the level of resistance to those values today, how should we respond?
One way is to adopt a wider perspective, rising above our molehills, as it were, to see the broader universe. If, as we learned in an earlier conversation, we are part of a divine plan, with earthly and heavenly helps pre-placed throughout everyone’s lives, then the concepts behind birth become clearer and the motivation to honor that understanding becomes all the greater. This life is a pre-arranged and pre-prepared school for the children of God with all the resources and helps we need in place. Every human being sent to earth has God-given potential to help us get through that school. Every aborted birth robs us of that potential.
At the same time, we should reassess our morality. An eternal perspective clarifies the value and proper nature of any relationships between men and women. It shines a light on the consequences these values have on individuals, communities and nations, emphasizing that bearing children is not the problem; the disintegration of the family, including absent parents and parenting, is.
God has commanded that the powers of procreation are to be employed only between a man and a woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife. Can you imagine the number of ills that would be prevented if we honored this one commandment?
If sexual activity of all types was employed only between a husband and wife dedicated to each other, then many diseases, crimes, broken hearts, broken families, infidelities, instances of abuse, sexual addiction, pornography, faithlessness, abandoned children, and a host of relate painful and destructive issues would largely go away. Questions about abortion and gender issues would clarify and be resolved. As well, the positive power that healthier families would add to our societies would improve life exponentially.
Given these powerful results, individuals, communities and nations should bend every effort to promote measures, mindsets and practices that strengthen our focus on whole-person and family development and our responsibility to do what we can to discourage and curtail promiscuity, human sexualization, and exploitation. We should support any measure designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.
Now, a final aside: God’s commandment to “multiply and replenish the Earth” never sanctions misusing our resources or having random sexual contact or pregnancies heedless of effect or consequence. Raising responsible, loved children within a faithful marriage between a man and a woman is the commandment. Caring for your partner is crucial to that love.
Improving our understanding of birth’s purposes, processes and consequences affects nearly all of life’s choices and would transform our world for the good.
Give life a chance. You never know what future you will birth.
Next: A bit about the roles of parents.
7. Drowning in Perfection
About unrealistic expectations, guilt, and an eternal perspective of our potential.
View the video (6:05)
In the Book of Mormon’s opening verse, Nephi begins his revelatory biography by saying, “I, Nephi, having been born of goodly parents…”
One of the greatest predictors of success in life is to have and be goodly parents. What does “goodly” mean, and how does it apply to us? In this address I will define the term and how it relates to your life and the good life, and whether or not “okay” is good enough for us.
Our society is nearly awash with images of perfectly prepared people with perfect children doing perfect things in perfect places, all of them saying, “Wish you were here.” How real is that? Has your stomach churned at the emptiness and lie behind that idyllic, pain-free front, or does your anxiety redline because your life doesn’t match theirs?
Dictionaries available in Joseph Smith’s day define the term “goodly” as “good-looking, pleasant, agreeable or desirable”. As such, he likely applied that word in his translation of the Book of Mormon to portray Nephi’s parents as being respectable. Using today’s slang, we might call them “good-ish”.
Whatever the interpretation, Nephi clearly falls short of calling them perfect. Rather than portraying them as mythically exceptional, something we sometimes do in our casual reading of the book, Nephi seems to admit that they were just a bit above average. Even given all they accomplished, he felt they were just good folks doing the best they could. When thrust into exceptional circumstances they rose to the challenge, but at their core, they were no different than you and I.
This lack of idealization hints that there were problems in the family. The murderous conflicts and competition among the brothers, which we will address later, certainly supports that idea. Lehi and Sariah were not perfect parents, nor did they raise perfect children, nor did they pretend to be. Even Nephi, their most obedient and admiring but doggedly pragmatic and practical son, only called them goodly.
He was not insulting them; after all, in God’s eyes, even with his shortcomings, Lehi was good enough to be a prophet in a time when prophets were sought out and slaughtered. Rather, Nephi’s goal seems to be to take away the unrealistic gloss of glorification. His parents did not set out to be legendary or impressive, they just wanted to have a good life, like most of us. Details from their stories make their plain humanity clear, which makes their heroism all the more remarkable and, to us, relatable. Because of their reliable, day-to-day goodness, God chose them to do great things. They did not seek for them. They were heroes because they were regular people who overcame their obstacles and did what they could.
One of Nephi’s consistent messages is that every person struggles with challenges and weaknesses. In fact, our weaknesses are gifts from God, opportunities crafted to each individual’s needs, intended to humble them and help them be more receptive to His guidance. Eventually, as we apply ourselves and apply to Him for help, those weaknesses can become strengths. 2 We do not need to be exceptional to overcome them; we just need to do what we can.
If you take the long view of life, goodly is all God asks of any of us. In this life we are not required to be without sin like Him; we are not even required to be exceptional, except perhaps when serving Him. One of the highest compliments God can give any of us is to call us acceptable. Not fantastic, not awesome, not perfect or amazingly super great—just acceptable. That means that he has accepted our efforts and ourselves and accepts us into His kingdom. No honor can be greater.
He will stretch us, he will try us. He will give us challenges that may wrench our very heartstrings, attempts to show us what He and we together can do. But however we come through those trials, as we strive for the eternal goal of becoming actually perfect, we can rejoice that He accepts us as we are.
Life is not about us being perfect. It is about us doing what we can. Do not drown your potential under a sea of guilt for goals you cannot reach. Do what you can. Be goodly.
We’ll discuss unintentional heroism in a future session. Next, however, let’s talk about goodly parenting.
8. Goodly Parents
Parenting, perfection, guilt and the ultimate path to success.
Watch the video (7:04)
“I, Nephi, having been born of goodly parents…”
In our last get-together we discussed what “goodly” means and how it relates to expectations the Lord has for us. I stated that one of the greatest predictors of success we have in life is to have and be goodly parents. Let’s take a closer look at the characteristics, expectations and value of goodly parents.
An excellent definition of goodly parents is a mother and father who love and care for each other and for their children. They do their best to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live.
They are dedicated to themselves, each other and their children and unite, commit to and care for each other and their family through marriage and all of its joy, pain, births, deaths, and beyond. They honor their marital vows with complete fidelity. They base their family life upon the teachings of Jesus Christ, establishing and maintain their marriages and families through faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.
In other words, as we discussed last time, they are people like you and me, doing the best they can with whatever they have. Sometimes they come up short but they always take the long view of their challenges, picking themselves up and moving on, taking their family with them. As such, they bring each other into eternity.
Parenting is a partnership focused on the strengths of each member. Ideally, fathers preside over their families in love and righteousness, providing the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers primarily focus on the nurture of their children. In all things, they help each other as equal partners. Circumstances may require adaptation, and extended families may need to lend support, but this basic structure provides all that children need to grow and become successful parents themselves. As they do, they have a greater likelihood of raising their own goodly generation, exponentially expanding these blessings among their descendants and to their communities and nations.
Individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will face the full consequences of their actions, in their own lives and in the lives of their children. We are surrounded by ample evidence of the inevitable calamities that follow the disintegration of the family. Parenthood is under attack globally, with destructive increases in the number of single-parent families, of divorces, and in children growing up without parents committed to each other through marriage. This abandonment blows large holes in the development of each child and crushes individual potential. We cannot escape the consequences of this decay.
The key to bringing about positive change in individuals, communities and nations is to promote measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society: to promote goodly parenting. All the politicians organizing in all the halls in all the world will never have the lasting impact of parents simply doing what they can to provide for their children, teaching them to love and serve each other, to observe the commandments of God, and to be good citizens. Doing so will extend that positive impact through their children’s children and, as I said, exponentially beyond.
To be clear, I am divorced. My wife and I parted after 35 years of what I and many others thought was blissful, enviable marriage.
Does that devalue everything I may have to say about being a goodly parent? Perhaps. That conclusion is up to you. It is something that occurs in the mind of every person that comes across these words. But I do not believe that divorce devalues. I do not believe that breaking up with your spouse makes you an evil person. I do believe that I it sears into our hearts that we all have things to work on. I certainly learned much in the wracking self-inquisition that comes when foundations are torn from under you. I am certain my former wife felt similar pain.
Can God redeem us? Can we be worthy of His love even if our marriage are ended? Of course we can. Your journey is not over. You, like each of us—certainly me— have much to work on. But you can move past the pain and the ever-present internal accusation of failure. You can be a good person and a good parent. You can continue to love your former spouse, and you may yet find someone else with whom to share eternal joy. Do what you can. Do not give up, and see where God takes you.
So, practically speaking, how do we do this? How do we become a good parent? How do we recover from whatever doubts, fears, pains or perceived failures dogs us? What of these principles can apply to us if we are not a parent? We’ll talk about that next time.