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A multimedia series about perspective, pain, and 68 healing words in First Nephi.
9: Actions Reactions
Two words of remarkable power, why they were chosen, and their everyday worth to you.
View the Video (6:05)
As we indicated last time, the Book of Mormon is a book of scripture like the Bible, written for our day. It is worth more than gold, filled with messages of personal power, meant for you. What is the source of its power? Could anything with such a fantastic backstory possibly be true? In this episode we begin walking through the book, mining its everyday worth to you.
How many times have you begun reading a book only to grow bored with it after a few pages and set it down? All serious authors know that the most important part of any book, besides the cover, is the first few words. In that brief span the author must engage the reader, set the volume’s tone, and convince him or her that this book is worth reading.
Nephi follows this principle with the first two words in his book, the phrase “I, Nephi”. Carefully chosen by a seasoned orator, author, poet, prophet and statesman over the 10 years he spent refining his message, their inclusion is intentional. They identify the speaker and prepare the reader to understand the context of his story.
He believed in their power so completely that he repeated the phase 86 times in his two books, underscoring repeatedly its authorship and importance. Several later contributors to the book followed his example.
“I, Nephi” is also partly autobiographical, a compact illustration of Nephi’s no-nonsense approach to life. He chose the words to dismiss all suggestion of subterfuge and guile, bulling then into the very front of his record. By so doing he declared, “I am who I am and take full responsibility for my words.”
As we reflect over Nephi’s writings, the words form a snapshot of him as an ironhanded middle-aged warrior king laying out the pedigree of a work God commanded him to produce. It is a colophon, as it were; a high-level summary of his most important product. He may not have understood every detail of its long-term value but he knew God had a plan for it.
Interestingly, the opening two words point to the phrase he uses to end his books: “I must obey”. They form bookends, tying the entire narrative into a cohesive bundle that spotlights his ultimate motivation. Whatever his fears, whatever his doubts, whatever the opposition or how long it took, the Lord had commanded him to create this work and he would do it. “I am Nephi,” he declared, “and I must obey.”
Even more, the first two words provide evidence that the book is a historical record, an actual product of his time. After the Book of Mormon was published in 1829, researchers began discovering Middle Eastern manuscripts written around Nephi’s time – 600 years before Christ – that contained similar literary structures. While today’s leaders sign their documents at the end, ancient leaders identified themselves up front, authenticating the weight, authority and consequences of their pronouncements. Nephi does the same, using his first two words as mallets to hammer into the reader’s mind his authority. Their presence is a subtle statement supporting Joseph Smith’s claim that the translation he created from ancient writings is the product he declared it to be.
Personally, I think these words are also the official stamp of a highly sensitive, plain-speaking prophet taking responsibility for his content. They form a warning, a sort-of literary “shaking the dust from his robes” ritual, as we will discuss later. It is a prophetic reminder that his words are not only fundamentally helpful in our everyday life, they will also stand as a witness for or against us in our everyday lives, and in the Day of Judgment. “I am Nephi,” he declares with words cemented in spiritual concrete. “My words matter.”
Once you begin to uncover their meaning, these two simple words become breathtaking and immensely powerful. They are the first hint that these works that he and the other Book of Mormon prophets labored over for a thousand years — and risked their lives for — have power, and that they have value for you today.
So, what is that value? Can they actually help you? In the next segment we will continue to research this promise, discussing the value of life, specifically your life, and its hope and unguessable potential. And we will see more viscerally how this book’s message applies to you today.
10: Learning Skills
Learning well, learning continuously, drinking deep from the well of whatever is available, making it a part of your life, and using it to help others.
View the Video (6:46)
“I, Nephi, having been born of goodly parents, therefore I was taught…”
Last time we spoke about consequences, balance, and the importance of teaching. Now, let’s talk about how we learn and how that affects you, using Nephi’s life as an example.
Teaching is fundamental to successful families. In fact, “teacher” is the very definition of a parent, from helping their children learn how to walk, talk, dress, and eat, to showing them how to drive a car, avoid danger, and respect family members and friends. Every day, in word, restraint, response, and example, parents are teachers. In fact, great parents make great teachers.
Mothers, grandparents, extended family, siblings, friends, strangers – everyone teaches. It is what we do, as individuals, parents, community members, and part of our global family. For good or bad, we teach and we learn, constantly.
Nephi’s formal learning came by going through the standard schools of his time. He attended weekly religious gatherings, Torah study, on-the-job training in his father Lehi’s business, life lessons at the knees of his mother, and in many other ways. Lehi, following the traditions of his fathers and his faith, the polyglot nature of living in an important center of regional trade, and his own basic business logic, made sure his sons also learned the skills of trade and language.
Nephi was also taught by example. He watched his parents, siblings, and friends, the common people on the street and everyone else. Nephi watched how his father conducted business transactions, how his actions expressed his attitude toward life, how he handled problems with his children, how he fearlessly confronted angry crowds, and what it took for him to upend his family and leave his home, without question, at the will of the Lord.
He watched how his mother struggled to accept all that her husband asked of her and how she handled doubt and remained faithful. As the middle child, he must have learned from her patience, compassion, and empathy as she acceded to and supported her husband’s ideas, then became a mighty rock on which he could lean. Most strongly, Nephi must have learned the importance of family as she tigerishly raged for her childrens’ protection as they accepted missions of near certain death, and later as she assumed the matriarchy of her unexpectedly expanded family.
Nephi learned as part of his own family teaching system, where parents teach each other and their children how to balance their lives. In becoming a husband and father himself, he was able to recycle and build upon those things he learned from others.
Ultimately, in families we learn to be like God. That is the goal. As such, a parent’s most valuable teaching is love: love for God, self, and those around them. Love is also the most valuable teaching tool.
Why? Because God is love, and that love is characterized by concern for others. You want the very best for them. You ache for their pain and work to help them prepare for its inevitable arrival. You are there for them, let them learn what they can from their experiences, and reach down and pick them up when they just cannot rise on their own.
Another critical benefit of love is patience. Any parent who has helped a toddler rise to its feet, again and again, knows the value of patience. It is the core of learning, on the part of the teacher in dealing with his own limitations and in facing the challenges of standing before yet another room full of students. It is also core to the learner as he or she struggles to grasp new concepts, personal limitations, and how to work with imperfect teachers.
The balance we find in love is the ultimate enabler. Many a student has been inspired by the teacher who does not give up, by the friend who stuck by you no matter your failings, and by the parent who was alway there for you, even after they had experienced another long day at work and terrible traffic.
Love recognizes that we are all imperfect, and that imperfection is okay. It is not only okay, it is expected.
Jeffrey R. Holland said, “So be kind regarding human frailty – our own as well as that of those who serve with you … Except in the case of His only perfect Begotten Son, imperfect people are all God has ever had to work with. That must be terribly frustrating to Him, but He deals with it. So should we. And when you see imperfection, remember that the limitation is not in the divinity of the work. As one gifted writer has suggested, when the infinite fulness is poured forth, it is not the oil’s fault if there is some loss because finite vessels can’t quite contain it all.Those finite vessels include you and me, so be patient and kind and forgiving.”
Learning is easy. We all do it. But learning well, learning continuously, drinking deep from the well of whatever is available, making it a part of your life, and using it as a tool to help others is harder.
Nephi was a thirsty learner. Next time we’ll take a look at what this concept means for us and how it contributes to our getting the most and the best out of life.
11: Thirsty Learning
One of our greatest contributions to our growth is pricking open the wellsprings of our curiosity.
View the Video (7:46)
Nephi’s story continues. He said, “I was taught somewhat …”
Here, “somewhat” means to me that his parents taught Nephi, but he learned a lot on his own. They laid a foundation of facts, philosophy, and faith. But their greatest contribution to Nephi’s growth was pricking open the wellsprings of his curiosity, making him what I call a thirsty learner.
Let’s illustrate this. In First Nephi chapter 17, Nephi and his family had been camping by the sea for what he calls “many days”, resting up from a very tough eight-year journey.
At some point, God told him to build a boat. Taking liberties with the story and extrapolating a few ideas, God may have said, “The boat will look like this. It will have to be this big, able to carry people and supplies for a very long voyage.”
Nephi’s imagination must have caught fire. “OO!” he may have thought. “Okay, we’re going to use wood, so we’ll need saws, hammers, barrels, masts, iron bands—excellent. I got this. So…” This is where he turns to the Lord. “Where can I find what I need to make this stuff?”
God loved Nephi’s dedication and faith. He showed Nephi where to find the things he needed, and then began a back-and-forth teaching odyssey. God worked with Nephi to help him visualize goals and the steps to get there, and Nephi labored to get it done, not only with the tools he had to make and master but also to gain the cooperation of his very uncooperative, rebellious brothers. But get it done he did. They united and built that boat. They called its workmanship “exceedingly fine”.
As I mentioned earlier, some of the skills he acquired in a lifetime of challenge and do-it-yourself learning include prophet, inventor, metalworker, shipwright, father, pioneer, architect, warrior, general, scholar, linguist, poet, historian, king and founder of a numerous people. He learned all this under wildly different circumstances, in Jerusalem, in the wilderness, at the edge of the sea, and starting with nothing again in an unknown, primal land. God taught him some of those skills, but the learning process began with patient parents daily pricking his desire to learn. Then his imagination and work ethic took over. That is all we could ask of any teacher.
Specifically, what did he learn from his mother?
Last time I said that he watched how his mother struggled to accept all that her husband asked of her and how she handled doubt and remained faithful. From that, he learned commitment, meekness, and humility. He also learned the order of things, and how power is available in every soul should that person rise to the occasion.
He learned from observing her patience, compassion, and empathy as she acceded to and supported her husband’s ideas, then became a mighty rock on which he could lean. From this, Nephi learned that you don’t always have to be in front to lead. Husbands and wives are expected to be equal partners in all aspects of their relationships even though their roles might be different. Fathers, for instance, are to preside over their families, but only in love and righteousness, loving their wife and children as Christ loved the church and sacrificed himself for it. He is also to provide for their physical and spiritual needs. Mothers, primarily, are to nurture their children. But together, they support each other as equal partners, always encouraging the best of each other and sacrificing for each others’ joy. In this way, they can each provide the support needed in those inevitable times when each struggles. They do not look at their roles as superior or competitive but as supportive, as partnerships, with each other, their children, and with God.
Most strongly, Nephi must have learned of the importance of family as he watched his mother tigerishly rage for her childrens’ protection as they accepted missions of near certain death, such as when the Lord sent them back to Jerusalem, along routes often infested with robbers, to a large city whose citizens and religious elite had conspired to murder their father and who could very likely target their sons, to confront a power-hungry despot who they knew could very likely kill their children out of mere spite. He learned from her love and humility, but Nephi also learned the power of counsel as she likely stayed up late talking this over with her husband. He learned, from her, faith.
At one point, Lehi’s family was joined by another large family. We have no ideas of their ages, but we know they were devout parents because of their unfailing willingness to leave their possessions and follow Lehi into the wilderness. Since Lehi arranged all this and was an acknowledged prophet, we can assume he became the new clan’s patriarch. As such, his wife Sariah become the matriarch of this unexpectedly expanded family.
I believe Nephi learned from her the necessity of listening, asking, organizing, preparing, and being flexible. He learned, by watching her, to value all family members, from the youngest to the oldest, the most obedient to the most obnoxious. He also learned to value his peers.
But most of all, Nephi learned from the Lord. His family came through all these strange and miraculous happenings because of God’s guidance. Watching the Lord work with his family members touched him deeply, lighting great desires in him to know more of God and His mysteries. They lit a lifelong fire in Nephi that changed the course of history for himself, for his family, for his people after him, and for us today.
We are grateful for Nephi and his thirsty learning.
We will touch more on the impact his mother and the Lord had in teaching him – and us – in our next discussion.
12: Fearless Teaching
Nephi’s mother nurtured a righteous generation, sons and daughters who spanned oceans and birthed civilizations. Her influence – and yours – is eternal.
View the Video (5:38)
In previous entries we touched on what Nephi’s father Lehi taught him, including how to run the family business, provide for his family, and protect and preside over them in humility, love and righteousness. What did he learn from his mother, Sariah?
Ancient scriptures primarily recognized the contributions of fathers, but mothers made great contributions to sacred and secular history as well. After all, husbands and wives are supposed to be equal partners. Nephi learned as much from his mother as from his father, if not more.
Given the relationships we can glimpse between Nephi’s parents, I believe Sariah was an active agent in raising their children. The two of them laid the foundation for overcoming unknowable pain and enabling unbelievable achievements by setting examples of love, discipline, hard work and loyalty, and by teaching them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be good citizens wherever they lived, even while being buffeted by terrifying political winds. Sariah taught her children to walk and talk, to work and to reverence God. I can see her and her husband counseling late into the night over family and business concerns.
A prophet’s wife must be every bit as worthy, patient, faithful and revelation-sensitive as the prophet. She held true to Lehi even when he turned his family’s life upside down. We have no record of her expressing regret or rebellion except when it appeared that their lives were actually at risk. Then, she was a tiger. Even then, she was humble enough to change her life when shown her shortcomings. She was a powerful woman.
Any successful father or leader recognizes that three-quarters of his support system is his wife. Russel M. Nelson outlined the need for such women today: “The kingdom of God is not and cannot be complete without women who make sacred covenants and then keep them, women who can speak with the power and authority of God … We need women who know how to make important things happen by their faith and who are courageous defenders of morality and families in a sin-sick world. We need women who are devoted to shepherding God’s children along the covenant path toward exaltation; women who know how to receive personal revelation, who understand the power and peace of the temple endowment; women who know how to call upon the powers of heaven to protect and strengthen children and families; women who teach fearlessly.”
Sariah was one of those women, often footsore and wondering where her next meal would come from but ferociously loyal to and protective of her family. She is one of the ideals of womanhood, the proof of which is in the lives of her children and grandchildren. Even those who went astray still accomplished amazing things.
Margaret D. Nadauld described such women eloquently: “When you observe kind and gentle mothers in action, you see women of great strength. Their families can feel a spirit of love and respect and safety when they are near her as she seeks the companionship of the Holy Ghost and the guidance of His Spirit. They are blessed by her wisdom and good judgment. The husbands and children, whose lives they bless, will contribute to the stability of societies all over this world. Grateful daughters of God learn truths from their mothers and grandmothers and aunts. They teach their daughters the joyful art of creating a home. They seek fine educations for their children and have a thirst for knowledge themselves. They help their children develop skills that they can use in serving others. They know that the way they have chosen is not the easy way, but they know it is absolutely worth their finest efforts.”
Nephi was blessed with amazing parents who were fearless in their ideals and in teaching them to their children. His mother nurtured a righteous generation, sons and daughters who spanned oceans and birthed civilizations. Her influence is eternal.
They raised children who were able to see clearly the blindness in the world around them and take the best path forward. Next time, we will talk about how to remove the blindness from our own eyes.
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