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A multimedia series about perspective, pain, and 68 healing words in First Nephi.
13. Blind Eyes
Enlarging our sight in a world increasingly coveting blindness.
View the Video (7:16)
In the opening verse of the Book of Mormon, Nephi includes two seemingly incidental words that, on closer examination, are both rich and potent: “Having seen”. What a marvelous phrase. You could write a book on those two words alone. Time limits what we can touch on here but let’s dive into their importance a bit, tapping at their meaning, focusing on their value to you.
“Seen” has the sense of having experienced or gone through something. It carries a meaning of personal observation with any combination of senses. But it also refers to having had your eyes opened, as in having something revealed and understood, something that makes a change in the viewer. It also refers to finally admitting something.
At the basic level, see, seeing and seen all refer to visual sight – what our eyes take in. This is a miraculous gift that we often take for granted. So many parts of our body intertwine to enable our eyes to interpret light and dark, shape, motion and depth to produce a continuous stream of images for our protection, edification, and for just getting us through the day.
The effectiveness of sight lies in accurately processing what you see. Nephi uses the phrase “having seen” as a way of telling us that he had experienced things. In this case, he tells us he had gone through many afflictions. (We will talk about afflictions in our next get-together.)
Extending that definition, “seeing” in part refers to giving objective meaning to what we see; that is, recognizing that a fast-approaching blob of light-and-dark is a tree, and if we don’t turn our bicycles right now we will run into it.
A higher level of seeing requires that we open our minds, to interpret what is presented to our eyes. This is something we do when we recognize that, not only is that thing we passed a tree, it is a life-giver, a home for millions of tiny creatures, a potential source of food, a peaceful place for a nap, and a great place to hide in when being chased by a bear. We take in meanings far beyond superficial forms, realizing a thing’s relevance, importance, power, position on a scale of goodness or badness, and an almost infinite level of further meanings.
We will use the example an infant to illustrate these meanings. One of the first things a newborn girl sees is a large, dark shape pressing against her face. As she grows, the child begins to assign meanings to it, including nourishment, comfort and love. Later, she identifies that presence as her mother. Further growth helps her see that lovingly interacting with her mother helps them both be happy. She then graduates to appreciating that mother for trying to keep her safe by, for instance, preventing her from touching hot stoves. From there she grows to see her mother as a wise counselor she would do well to value. Later, she acts upon the counsel given by her mother when in her own hot-stove situations, expanding her understanding of those words and incorporating them into her daily life.
Further, as that daughter becomes a mother and raises her own children, she can see and internalize what her mother went through in raising her. Her mother’s experiences, in essence, become her.
Finally, when we are in the presence of God and see ourselves and those around us with His perspective we will see the potential and purpose mothers have in His eyes and the impact those women have had, on generations of their descendants and on through eternity. We have opened our hearts and gained ultimate sight.
Nephi’s parents were exemplars of this kind of sight. They instilled in their children the confidence – the vision – to handle incredible challenges and to raise themselves to the mountaintops God planned for them. None of their lives turned out as they had planned – when do they ever? – but with the help of God they triumphed over their obstacles and raised powerful generations.
Eyes can be opened through good counsel as well as they can through small events accumulating over time. Too often, however, some eyes are only opened through tragedy. Christ talked about people having eyes to see but not seeing, one of the great tragedies of this life. He described himself as the source of light, the illumination of truth in darkness, the ultimate enabler of true vision. He gave and continues to give sight to the blind, which includes you and I, both figuratively and actually.
Speaking of blindness: How many of us refuse to see what we are shown? Accidental blindness means that we no longer process images. Intentional blindness means that we close the eyes of our understanding so that we no longer process truth. Spiritual blindness is the process of blocking impressions that give meaning to events and things, an avoidance process we employ to try to hide from responsibilities and consequences.
What will it take before we finally see as we are seen and see the Lord eye-to-eye? What consequences does blindness bring us? Let’s pivot to the subject of affliction, one of the nearly inevitable results of blindness, and see how we can deal with and learn from it.
14. Many Afflictions
Learning joy from one who suffered much.
Video (6:31)
You know what pain is – emotional, mental, physical pain – and what it can do.
Pain was such a part of Nephi’s life that he opened his story with it. In his first paragraph he said, in part, “having seen many afflictions…”
These chilling words hint at the challenges he faced, challenges that knocked him to the ground again and again, life-threatening challenges, any one of which would level most of us.
Let’s take a look at what he went through, how he got back to his spiritual feet, and how he harvested joy from such pain. His goal, after all, was to show us how to do the same.
A catalog of Nephi’s pain? Let’s see, where to begin?
How about with his childhood? As we said before, he lived in warlike times, which was bad enough. But things got worse when Nephi was about 13 years old. His neighbors joined the local authorities in threatening to murder his outspoken father, Lehi. Instantly, the once peaceful, respected, wealthy family became refugees, fleeing their home.
Not all in the family agreed with their father’s actions. The two older brothers resented this sudden loss of home, respect, and possessions, and probably the stir he made in the community that led to it. They followed him, but reluctantly.
Their hearts held murder.
Later, huddled in a camp a few weeks outside the city, Dad sent the boys back to obtain their family history. This was a fearsome task because the record was held by the city’s powerful and corrupt commanding general, Laban, someone who, as we said before, might murder them out of sheer spite.
Sure enough, Laban stole the fortune they brought to purchase the record and tried to kill them for their troubles. Twice.
Hiding in a cave, fearing for their lives, a fight broke out between the boys, escalating until Laman and Lemuel beat Nephi with a rod. It took the commanding presence of an angel to stop them.
Undaunted, Nephi retrieved their history under God’s guidance. After returning to camp, Lehi sent the boys out again to convince a friend, Ishmael, and his family to join them. The family did, but another fight broke out and the older boys tied up Nephi and left him to die. He escaped so they tried again but were eventually dissuaded.
Are we seeing a pattern here?
The families suffered great privation as their father led them further into the wilderness. They were often near starvation, “wading through much affliction”, and eating raw meat.
During their eight-year trip, Ishmael died. In their grief, much of the camp rebelled and tried to return home. When Nephi objected, his brothers again tried to murder him—and their father.
Years later, the Lord commanded Nephi to build a boat to carry them across the ocean. More rebellion, more threats, more miraculous intervention. On the trip, everyone nearly drowned in a massive storm when the partying older brothers tied the protesting Nephi up for days. The incident nearly killed their parents and their two new infant brothers. Only when the storm threatened to drown them all did they relent.
Arriving at a primal land, everyone began to carve out a new life. Then Lehi died. You can imagine what happened next. Now unrestrained by their father, the boys fought again, forcing Nephi and his followers to flee, becoming refugees once more, again rebuilding their world from scratch.
For the rest of their lives, the two factions waged war, causing Nephi’s people to mourn out their days.
But none of these events topped his pain list. His worst affliction? Seeing a vision in which his descendants fought each together for a thousand years until his people were utterly wiped out. And he knew the process was starting here.
At some point, his woes and painful introspection caused him to cry in agony, “O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins…”
Much pain.
Suffering. Yeah. Nephi knew it.
But he got through it. He mustered enough faith and optimism to write some of the most uplifting and influential messages of all time, designed to uplift you and show you your own path away from pain.
How did he do it? Let’s take look—next time.
15. Watered Pillows
Dealing with anxiety and self-doubt.
Video (7:21)
As we saw last time, Nephi knew physical, emotional, and mental pain, personally. It nearly killed him several times. Even more, his pain was magnified by the trauma of watching others suffer.
You may have felt the same way, perhaps as a loved one went astray despite years of earnest pleading. How did Nephi deal with his anxiety, the self-doubt, the hurt? How did he harvest joy from pain? Can you?
Nephi spent his life under the direction of God, “watering his pillow” at night and laboring each day to help his people. He knew that pain was part of life, but he also knew that God intended us to spend our lives rejoicing, not wallowing in woe. Our Father in Heaven is a god of love, compassion and power, and His point to pain is to be a warning and schoolmaster to humble and strengthen us so we can put off the hurt and realize a fullness of joy. He doesn’t allow hurts because He is spiteful or because he likes to see us suffer. He sent His son to die for our happiness and allowed Jesus to take upon himself the punishment for our sins, suffering godly sorrow and godly pain for us taking upon himself all suffering for every person for all time. The agony must have been unimaginable for both the Father, watching and allowing this to happen, and the Son.
This does not sound like someone who enjoys watching us suffer.
Everyone hurts, and pain can come from anywhere. Even so, we must not waste our time debating origins or blaming others, and certainly not in comparing our hurt with others’. A better use of our time is to take action.
Through Nephi’s lifetime of hurt, he remained optimistic and unwaveringly positive. How? Part of the answer lies in a hymn he wrote, which we touched upon last time: “O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins …”
Can you see his despair, his self-doubt, blame, and redlined anxiety? He saw his people unravel in spite of all he could do. You may have heard similar words from someone you have been helping, a plea in the dark, a desperate last cry for help from a suffering soul.
At the time, Nephi was a husband, father and likely grandfather, a prophet-warrior-king who had seen eternity and knew God. Still, as we discussed last time, the weight of guilt for having foreseen a thousand years of genocide among his descendants, perhaps stemming from his inability to handle his brothers, must have weighed on him immensely.
But he did not let sorrow master him. He reached out, seeking someone to share his hurt. In his hymn of prayer, I imagine him on his knees, pleading with his Father in Heaven, the ultimate comforter.
That same path is open to you. If you are hurting, seek help.
As his prayer continued, Nephi took hard-eyed stock of himself and his situation, saying: “Why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions? And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?”
This introspection caused him to be more aware of where he stood in his life, where he needed to go and how to get there. The past was gone; he was who he was. The best path for him was to go forward. He did, in partnership with others.
He finished with this commitment: “O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever … Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh … therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen.”
Nephi recognized his hurt. He realized that much of his suffering was needlessly self-inflicted, the product of doubt, self-blame, and lack of effort. That recognition strengthened his determination to round up his shoulders, seek counsel from trusted friends, thrust off the pain and move forward with increasing hope and faith, relying on God as the source of his strength and healing. God comforted him and he prevailed.
Today, we would say he turned off the news, turned away bad influences and reached out to God and trusted friends for help. He got on with it. Just like we should do.
Life is too short to waste it wallowing in self-pity. What should you do with your limited time?
16. Your Limited Time
How best to make use of your limited time on earth.
Video (6:20)
Nephi knew that his life would not be long in comparison to eternity. More practically, he knew he had a limited time on Earth to make a difference for good. He strove to make excellent use of his time and to help others do the same.
What will you do with your time?
As stated before, Nephi used the phrase “my days” three times in the Book of Mormon’s opening paragraph. In the first instance, he used it to hint at the suffering that filled his life: “Having seen many afflictions in the course of my days…”
His appraisal of his suffering is accurate. Growing up, he evaded being murdered several times. As an adult, he was leader of a “stiffnecked” and “hard-hearted” people who seemed determined to ignore his counsel, instead choosing to suffer the consequences of poor choices, even if those choices led to their risking death at the hands of his marauding brothers. Nephi’s outlook for peace always seemed bleak.
One of the advantages of knowing the Savior, however, is that you gain a sense of perspective. God showed Nephi that we had lived as eternal spirits before we came to this life and that we will live forever after. That knowledge can be immensely strengthening and comforting.
This means that, in comparison to eternity, our life here is very short. Blink and you are a child; blink again and you are on your own. Again, and you are married with children. Again and they have their own children. Again and you face eternity.
No person knows when his or her life will end. Our jump into the next world can come at any time, making our length of time here uncertain, our opportunities here all the more precious.
In the pre-Earth world, we worked with God to develop a detailed plan for our life, enabling helps to limit and get us through our challenges, with the ultimate goal of becoming like and living with Him. He granted us enough time to do this and arranged reminders that our thoughts and actions here impact our lives hereafter.
With such plans in place, how we use our time has eternal implications. How can we combat the barriers, like selfishness, addiction, and competing priorities, that keep us from engaging with life? When we approach eternity, how will we feel about all we have done? Who will our thoughts and actions have molded us into?
In seeking how best to use our time, we have been granted guidance through the Scriptures, the Holy Spirit, those around us, our consciences, and our own experiences. The Savior Himself outlined our highest priorities when He said:
“Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.”
He added:
“Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it.”
Opportunity costs occur when we save our own lives, that is, turn inward and focus on self-interest rather than turning outward to help others, thereby losing that self-serving self. Getting lost in electronic distractions like TV, the Internet, and social media takes away opportunities to make a positive difference in others’ lives. Reaching out by spending time loving, healing, forgiving, strengthening, listening and bringing peace and harmony to others can lift drooping shoulders, the slow shuffle, the addict, the unhappily alone, the angry, the lost, and the always sad. Turning the analogy around, when your own shoulders inevitably droop, you will wish the passersby buried in their electronic distractions would look up and reach out to you.
Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, “Those who wholeheartedly turn their lives over to our Savior and serve God and fellowman discover a richness and fulness to life that the selfish or egotistic will never experience. The unselfish give of themselves. These may be small gifts of charity that have a grand impact for good: a smile, a handshake, a hug, time spent in listening, a soft word of encouragement, or a gesture of caring. All these acts of kindness can change hearts and lives. When we take advantage of the unlimited opportunities to love and serve our fellowmen, including our spouse and family, our capacity to love God and to serve others will greatly increase.”
In our next get-together, we will dive deeper into the value of acknowledging pain and gaining this eternal perspective.
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